Monday, January 3, 2011

hello new year!

I'm not really a fan of making resolutions, because I feel like I haven't accomplished much when I later look at a list of things of things that I haven't done. Instead, I'd prefer to have goals that I am working towards, to better myself and those around me. I don't think I am alone in this, as I've seen many other posts about goals, rather than resolutions!

I'll be frank, 2010 wasn't the best year for me. It wasn't horrible, per se, but just not that terrific either. I feel as though I was treading water much of the time, sometimes gasping for breath, and not really gaining anything in any aspect of my life. Again, nothing bad, but nothing great. Sometimes I feel a bit aimless, because I don't always know what I want from life, and that frustrates me to no end. Of course I have goals, things that I want to do, but my mind changes sometimes, sometimes too often, and I just can't always keep up with myself.

There are so many things that I want to do, but I just don't always know how to do them. I think that I need a more clear path and a way to figure out what is possible and what may just be a pipe dream. It isn't as though I am not realistic; I think I am, but I also may not give myself enough credit when I should. People have told me this for a long time. I am my own worst critic and don't take compliments well. I don't know why, but this is something that I need to work on. I can't be so hard on myself, because I really am. This has been going on since high school, and that was so long ago! I need to forget silly insecurities, but sometimes, I just don't know how to let go of them.

Also this year? Teaching. I want to decide once and for all if I want to teach. I've written about this many times before, so I won't go too into it, but teaching is something that has been in the back of my mind for so long, and it won't go away. I came close to applying for a teaching fellow program last year, but didn't. I think I may apply this year. I want to see about possibly shadowing a teacher in DC for a day, to see what it is really like. The idea of teaching terrifies me, but aren't you supposed to conquer your fears?

Also, yoga. I was going somewhat regularly last year, but stopped, for no reason other than laziness. I really enjoyed it, and loved the way I felt after, so I need to get back into it. That, and eating better. Again, I am lazy and can't be. I have a zillion cookbooks, I need to use them. Anyone in DC want a new yoga buddy? I need someone to help motivate me!

Oh, and the quilting thing! I need to get more comfortable with my machine. Again, I lack some confidence with my skills, but they aren't as bad as I think! I've loved being a member of the DC Modern Quilt Guild this year (we have a mini retreat next Saturday!), and I've learned a lot from those girls and other quilters I've met through their blogs and twitter. Steve bought me my own domain for Christmas, along with all of the things I need to set up my sewing room (tables, shelves and everything!). I want to get this all set up by the end of the month, and use the domain for a strictly quilting blog. I would like to get an etsy shop going eventually too. Goal? Two new projects a month, at first, and then eventually, one a week! Of course, they don't have (and won't be!) huge quilts, but even small things like doll quilts, pot holders, etc. All sorts of things.

One more thing! I used to be so good at sending cards. Birthday cards, anniversary cards, wedding cards, happy new baby cards, get well cards, etc. The last six months or so, I've just sucked, and not sent them. I sent my grandmother a birthday card in October, but that was it. I have stamps, lots pf pretty stationary and cards, so I need to get back at sending them. Want a love note? I'll send one, eventually :) With that in mind, I owe a few wedding gifts to people (for shame!). Since I usually travel to the wedding, I don't always bring it with me, which is bad of me, so so bad, I know. I need to get gifts for these people. I am not the kind of girl who sends cash or a check. Emily Post says I have a year, but still, I know that it is poor form on my part to send things so late.

This is where I'm at, on the third day of January. Oh, I also need to buy a new calendar for my desk, but maybe I can get that at lunch...

Where are you this week? Any big goals? Resolutions? Changes to speak of?


Heidi said...

i'd be happy to goal coach you if you wanted it :) :)

also, we can make bi-weekly yoga dates to check out new studios in DC. :)

Annie said...

I love sending cards too but sometimes it is hard to remember. Do you use Outlook as a reminder?

You know, I'm the same way on weddings - never take them to out of town ones. I've found it is easiest to send them a few weeks after I receive the invitation and have them sent directly to the bride and groom. That way they receive the gift prior to leaving for the wedding and it is done for you. Totally worth the extra money in shipping!

Kimberley said...

Don't be soooo hard on yourself Lexiloo! Life is about the journey and no one ever has it all figured out! Teaching is the most rewarding thing I've ever done....I'm sure you'd be great at it! Shadowing someone is a great way to see what it is really like! Big hugs from NH!