Friday, July 24, 2009

embraceable you

It occurred to me last night that today is exactly six months until my birthday...on that birthday, I'll turn 30.

I've been thinking about that now and thinking about what it means. I've never been one of those girls who was particularly bothered by her age. Each birthday was lovely in many ways and I have happy memories from each and every one of them (ask me about my 22nd sometime. and my 23rd. and my 24th). Sometimes, when being asked how old I am now, without thinking about it, I say "oh, I'm 27." I'm not at all trying to downplay my age- but sometimes, I really do forget how old I am! Does that sound ridiculous? I just don't feel like I am anywhere close to being 30, but here it is!

Many of my friends are married and having babies, and now my sister's friends are getting married (she's 25!) and I can't help but think that they are way too young for that! It just doesn't seem possible that my friends or her friends are doing these things!

A friend of mine who will be 30 in October is extremely bothered by it. In fact, she says she's ignoring the day all together (mind you, she threw her husband a surprise party for his 30th!). I'm not feeling like I'll ignore my day; I'll embrace it.

Thinking about it though, I'm sure that I've always thought that certain things would be accomplished by the time I was 30. I figured I'd be married and have a corgi (obviously!), maybe a child, a house, a career, all of that. With the exception of the corgi, I don't see myself having any of those things in the next six months. By the time my mother was 30, she had me and my sister, a lovely Britany Spaniel called Sophie, my darling Daddy, and a cute white house in my wonderful hometown. Okay, so I have two Master's degrees...that should count for something though, right?

Of course, things don't always turn out how you imagine they might. Things may not be what I thought, but I am still pretty happy with the way things are (I do want that corgi though!).

Madeleine L'Engle said that "the great thing about getting older is that you don't lose all the other ages you've been." I love this, and it is so true. My mind is filled with so many memories and I know that there is room for many, many more.

How did/do you feel about your 30th? How did you celebrate? Or did you? ;)

Maybe I'll buy myself a really fabulous present...


Anonymous said...

considering it'll be about 14-17 years between 20 and 30 for me (depending on when i decide to finally "turn 30") i know exactly what you mean. i stuck with 26 for a reason... even a year after i legally turned 26 i still said "26" when people asked me how old i was. for some reason that age just stuck.
and much like you i had always imagined i'd have a completely different life at 30 (kids, picket fence, etc) but these days so many of us enjoy our youth much more than our parents did. i mean really, i feel like they went from high school students to adults at lightening speed. i don't think either way is wrong, i often think of how nice it get married and start your family younger, how much longer you get to enjoy that life. but as much as i wish M and i had met earlier and married 10 years ago i also wouldn't change the experiences i was able to have as a young adult.
does that even make sense? sorry for the rambles.

Jess said...

I'm only 25 at the moment but I can absolutely imagine that I will embrace turning 30. I look forward to it, in a way. Not that I'm in a rush to grow older but I think it will be a great decade.

Lauren said...

Ooohh i love that quote!

Melanie said...

I keep telling my mom that if I'm not married by the time I'm 30, I'm registering for gifts for my 30th birthday!

I have conflicting feelings about my age. In some ways it's a badge of honor for my experience and accomplishments. On the other hand, I always thought that my life would be different at 28: a family, or if not, a career. I still feel 23 because my life is still as unsettled as it was when I was 23.

Ashley said...

Honestly, I kind of dread turning 30. I'm hoping by the time it comes around (over 5 years from now) I'll be more open to the idea and will embrace it. If not, I'm just going to have a party with my friends and family and make the most out of it! And I love Melanie's idea of registering for gifts, haha!

La Petite Chic said...

I get depressed on every birthday because I hate getting older! I have a few more years until 30 but I think I'll probably cry :)

Jill said...

I loved turning 30. 30 is such a fun age, unless you don't want it to be. :) I had a huge party for my 30th (that I threw for myself). It was really fun.

I can't wait to see what you'll do for your 30th. You should definitely buy yourself a fabulous gift.

Sommelier0124 said...

hmmm. As we have the same birthday I guess I should be thinking about turning the big 30. But I really haven't.

On first thought yes there are many things that I thought I would have by 30. An amazing career, House (or sweet nyc/dc apt), spouse, dog, and possibly a kid of my own.

And now that I turn 30 in approx 6 months I look back at what I have: a loving soon to be spouse, 2 bunnies whom I adore, and I live in a small apartment with the guy I love.

Overall it is not the way I planned my life to be but you know what- I love that about my life. In the years since we graduated college I have done everything I wanted to do- I traveled, I lived in NYC, I made new friends, and I was well on my way to building an impressive career (until the economy tanked.)

In all it's twists and turns I have enjoyed myself, and as such I never thought to fear 30. Actually I am looking forward to it- cause I can't wait to see what the next decade will bring.

magda said...

The thought of me being thirty is kind of shocking, I'll be honest. It's right around the corner for me, too, but there's something about it that seems so, just, decisive. I know just what you mean about mental ideas of what you "should" have accomplished by now.

What I've learned is this, though: modeling our lives to scale on others' paths, especially our parents', just isn't productive. Our lives are the product of both our times and our (good) choices. Your mom didn't have two master's, nor did she get to live abroad for any substantial period of time! There is a great plan for you. Like everything else, it'll play out on its own timeline : )

(Also, can I be the future corgi's godmother?)

anOCgirl said...

i stopped 'aging' after 21. every birthday after that has been the (insert # here)th anniversary of my 21st birthday. i turned 30 last fall, and while i did have some anxiety about it, i got over it fast. i may not have everything i want, but i do love my life. that's all that matters really. age is just a number.

my birthday was during college football season so i celebrated by hanging out in a sports bar all day with friends watching all the college football games. i'd like to think that USC won the game that day just for me.

kbreints said...

oh ugh. I turn 30 next year and I am honestly umm... half way ok with it...

I have decided that I will no longer celebrate anything but anniversary's of my 29th birthday!

Anonymous said...

When I turned 29 I joked to everyone that it was my first annual 29th birthday. At the time, 30 was a very scary number. However; around the time I turned 30 earlier this year - my husband and mom threw me a birthday party at a hockey game and I embraced 30 whole-heartily. My 30th year has been awesome so far. I think us women are like wine - better with age.

Have a big party - you only turn 30 once!